Wednesday, April 18, 2012

The Red Menace

Red Berries call for red puns! the problem is I'm just not inspired by the ones I have so far, they mostly are crude, involve song lyrics and obscure references to the Chinese gubment. I have my reasons for this lack of excitement of course. Reason the first- I spent almost 8 hours yesterday picking 4000 plants by myself. (Well technically my friends Jad Abumrad and Robert Krulwich, were with me. They so often are, when they can be bothered to put out a new damn episode.) And that makes your back sad. Reason the second- The early late frost that swept through last week nipped a bunch of the blossoms despite my covering in the heavy wind antics. and finally its looking like they are all gonna come on fast and furious because of the strange weather. They aren't setting new blooms like we would hope, which means no new berries. Whats up with that?

Its not all grim though. We sold a shitton of them today, they were so sweet and tasty, and they do seem to make people genuinely happy. Its like they can't seem to accept Springs arrival without the little goodies. Probably because fresh out the grocery store they taste mostly of water mixed with some astringent scented body cleaning product, and just a hint of dog shit that was drug thru something slightly sweet. But fresh from the field, before long hours of shipping and refrigeration work their magic, they taste sweet and tart, they have a complex flavor that is purely unique and rarely can be correctly described,. well maybe that's it. They have a flavor. People always say things like that's what they tasted like when I was a kid. Usually this kind of thing would be obnoxious, cuz come on everything's better when your a kid(Adam Sandler movies etc.) But I get it. strawberries just might have to go with tomatoes and melons into that special box. the one that says " Eat these at appropriate times and they wont be shitty. They will be awesome and amazing. They might even give your mouth O's. Otherwise enjoy your papery tasting water"

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